Musings from a Millennial –
Agendas and anti-agenda toddlers
By Meghan Peterson, PhD
In watching my son develop into his own person, I realize that toddlers are the most anti-agenda beings on this planet (except perhaps for dogs). What I mean by this is young children are averse to their millennial parents’ approach to life which is to overthink the meaning of people’s words and intentions; underestimate the importance of individual freedom and autonomy; and hyper-curate one’s image on social media for personal indulgence and others’ consumption.
Toddlers are allergic to agendas – political or otherwise. All toddlers want to do is love, be loved, imagine, eat, play and laugh – without regard for cultural censorship programming (hate speech laws, I’m looking at you), communist yearnings for an all-knowing state (Alexandria Ocasio-Cortes, I’m looking at you) or the number of likes one’s Facebook profile photo receives (millennial peers, I’m looking at us). I take each point in turn.
Overthinking the meaning of people’s words and intentions
Millennials enjoy parsing one’s intent the way a grammarian parses syntax. This can be both a desirable and an undesirable trait. On the one hand, understanding someone’s intent motivating words or actions is valuable if the objective is to discern truth and genuineness. On the other hand, plumbing the depths of someone’s words or behaviors in order to achieve a moment of: “Gotcha! You’re racist, sexist, and bigoted because of all of the micro-aggression-y things-you’re-engaging-in-even-though-you-weren’t-even-aware-of-it-but-now-you’re-being-tried-in-the-court-of-political-correctness.”
If a male cashier at a grocery store says to me “Have a great day, miss!” choose the correct answer below for how a millennial-in-good-standing ought proceed: a) excoriate him for using the sexist designation “miss”; b) stipulate that he should have used the term “Ms.”; c) inform him that the phrase “Have a great day, miss!” is in command form and therefore has an embedded power imbalance, especially because the speaker is male and the addressee is female (as savvy millennials know, gender is a marker of inherent inequality); d) all of the above. Did you choose your answer? Ding! Ding! It is: d) all of the above. Millennials are sensitive to dynamics of power and inequality. We must rid language of their oppressive invocations – including “have a great day.”
Now, from the anti-agenda viewpoint of a toddler, the above scenario is ridiculous (worth ridiculing). A toddler would just say “hi” or “bye bye” and be happy that there are other friendly, kind people in this world who wish others a “good day.”
Underestimating the importance of individual freedom and autonomy
Political luminaries of my generation include new kids on the block such as Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. A Congresswoman representing New York’s 14th congressional district, Ocasio-Cortez preaches the communist gospel with conviction and spirit. How could an educated individual, born and raised in the land of the free such as she, find appealing a political dogma that is at its core anti-freedom, anti-individual? How could a college-graduate, United States political office-holder subscribe to a doctrine that survives if and only if individual freedom, autonomy/self-agency, and familial ties are subsumed and consumed by the STATE.
Now, from the anti-agenda viewpoint of a toddler, investing in communism would be like pooling his toys together, giving them to the MAMA and PAPA, saying “here, PARENTS, tell me which of these toys to use (that are no longer mine), how to use these toys (that are no longer mine), and when I need to give these toys (that are no longer mine) back to the STORE for reintegration into the broader pool of TOYS.
The situation just described would not make sense to the toddler. Nor should it make sense to a millennial adult – or any other adult.
But the communist agenda demands exactly that: give your personhood, freedom, autonomy, family, faith, possessions away…to a state that is designed to fail you at every turn.
Hyper-curating/sanitizing one’s image on social media
Millennials like constructing impeccable images of themselves and their families on social media – the way they appreciate a well-crafted micro-brew.
Now, from the anti-agenda viewpoint of a toddler, anxieties over one’s social media status are much ado about nothing. A toddler may think (in toddler-speak, of course) “Why agonize over who is going to click “like” for the family photo you just posted, Mommy, when what you really should be focusing on is how much I love you.” Perhaps we as millennials would do well to spend more energy loving our children in the real world, rather than concerning ourselves with social media metrics of virtual world likes and shares.
On these summer evenings, when my toddler and I take our nightly walks to look at the stars, gaze at the moon, spy the fireflies and hear the barred owls, I am reminded at how free, self-defining, imaginative, and playful this little being is standing (or running) beside me. For this is what individual freedom and autonomy are all about – not having an agenda, not over-thinking, not overly preening one’s image.
My toddler’s way of being is simple. It is sans agenda. It is this: Go outside. Watch the fireflies. Talk to the owls. More importantly, just be.
*Peterson is Composition Editor of Haddam News.
