By Philip Devlin
(September 30, 2026) — It was my privilege to have been Marge DeBold’s friend for the past fifty years. I last saw her on September 15, 2026 at the Haddam Senior Center. I gave her a kiss, and we visited for several minutes. She told me that she wanted to hear me speak there that day. I felt honored. Still mentally sharp, she did, however, sound weak.
I used to visit her and her dog, Roscoe, regularly when she was healthier, often bringing her berries from my backyard, which she loved. Our conversations were far reaching as she was always current not only on local issues but also on national and world affairs. Marge DeBold had what the Romans used to call gravitas, a dignified and authoritative manner that commands trust and respect from others. She was terrific.
Her memory was excellent, and she could tell interesting and humorous stories. In 1970, for example, she and her husband, Dick, were to attend the planned Powder Ridge Rock Festival in Middlefield from July 31st to August 2nd. Fearing an onslaught of people similar to Woodstock, the people of Middlefield passed an ordinance banning the event on July 29th. Nevertheless, more than 30,000 people showed up with hopes to hear rock stars such as Janis Joplin, Jethro Tull, James Taylor, Fleetwood Mac, Joe Cocker, and many others. Marge happened to cross paths with the writer Anais Nin in Middlefield. She and Dick took her back to Middletown and fed her. She gave them an inscribed first edition copy of one of her many books. I saw the book several years ago when Marge asked me to evaluate her book collection.
Several people have contacted me with memories of Marge. Doreen Staskelunas, director of the Haddam Senior Center had this to say: “Marge DeBold was a giant in Higganum. Very few people have as big an impact on their community as she (has). It didn’t matter if you knew Marge for five minutes or since she came to town, she cherished the connection and you were better because of it. I will deeply miss our talks and interactions.” Doreen added that recently, then-First Selectman “Bob McGarry read a proclamation designating July 27th (Marge’s birthday) as Marge DeBold Day forever and always.” (photo below)
Longtime teaching colleague, Kathy Hennessey, had this remembrance: “I worked with Marge for several years at Burr School. She was wonderful to work with–professional, supportive, and creative. I always knew I could depend on her for assistance when needed. Just as she was dedicated to her teaching, in later years she gave of her time and talents in service to her town. Marge was always there to help.”
Another teaching colleague, Nancy Walts, happened to see Marge by chance at Middlesex Hospital last summer. Nancy had this to say “most fondly” about her friend: “I remember Marge DeBold as the beautiful California girl with the sparkling blue eyes, the engaging smile, the braid reaching well past her waist, and her very handsome, white-haired husband Dick as her soulmate. Marge was easy-going, extremely social, yet hard as nails when the situation warranted. I always considered her to be the icon of the community and RSD17. I recall many hours spent in her very cozy kitchen with the teacher negotiating team. Marge’s warmth and hospitality was most welcoming.”
Another friend and teaching colleague, Gail (Manning) Hanson remembers when Marge started teaching at HES: “Marge started teaching in our district when I was in 3rd grade (1967-1968). She was an excellent hands-on teacher, an inspiration for me in my teaching.”
Marge, of course, served on many boards and commissions for Haddam and was even easily elected First Selectman in the early to mid-1990’s. She also was a keen supporter of the Haddam Historical Society, whose director, Lisa Malloy, said of Marge’s passing, “I am heartbroken.” Sue DeCarli remembered, “Marge was a mentor to me and a very dear neighbor who motivated me to get involved in my community.”
Haddam First Selectman Sean Donlan recalled, “Every year I looked forward to the field trip Marge sponsored for grammar school students to visit the Thankful Arnold House and, if time permitted, Marge would bring them to my house to look around and stand on the porch. Playing cards with Marge is my favorite memory, as she loved setback. Even recently, when she had to ask for help to shuffle, she would insist on dealing the cards and played the game as sharply as she did decades ago.”
Friends Jenny Pringle remembers, “It’s not everyone who had a friend who was their third and sixth grade teacher at HES, family friend who suggested the colleges I should look at and then attended (Washington College in Maryland and Wheelock College in Boston) or contact person who reached out when I was looking to relocate from California back to Connecticut. Marge let me know that there was a teacher opening at our former school, Haddam Elementary School. While I was a longtime third grade teacher at HES, Marge was always happy to talk about teaching and enthusiastically supported our Haddam town history studies. It’s easy to say Marge DeBold has been an anchor in my life. She was a gem to me, my family, and this town. She will be missed and never forgotten.”
Marge leaves behind three nieces in California. (She grew up in Santa Monica). On October 24, 2026, there will be a one-hour visitation at Doolittle Funeral Home in Middletown from 10:00 a.m. to 11:00 a.m. followed by a brief service.
Marge was a longtime supporter of the Haddam Lions Club. On the behalf of the Club, I express our sincere sympathy on her passing.
Just an all around beautiful person. I’m deeply saddened to learn of her passing. RIP Marge…
Marge was one of the kindest, and most thoughtful people I have ever known. I honestly never heard her say a negative thing about anyone or anything. She always found the good in people. She cared deeply about her students, friends and the town she loved. When Marge ran for First Selectman, I changed my political affiliation so I could be part of her campaign (still a Democrat). It was a privilege to work beside her then, just as it was to work beside her for so many years. I pray for her beautiful soul. Rest well my friend.❤️
Barbara Wipprecht
Well said, Phil.
Mrs. DeBold was my third-grade teacher, and I loved her. I still remember her big, broad smile and the long ponytail that reached her waist. And of course her big cup of coffee. She was a wonderful person and teacher, and I feel lucky to have been her student.
Thank you, Phil! This is a beautiful tribute honoring Marge, who was a beautiful person in every way. I learned the sad news when I called to chat with her the day she passed. My 4 daughters had Marge as their teacher in 6th grade at HES. Deirdre also had her in 3rd Grade, as did Jenny Pringle – lucky girls! During the 25 years I spent in Haddam Marge was a part of my life in many ways, especially in my Democratic endeavors. Since then we have kept in touch and I will miss not being able to stop in to visit with her any time I drive through Higganum. There was always a ‘welcome on the Mat’!
Thank you for that most beautiful photo of Marge’s smile. It is a perfect portrait that will remain in our hearts with love forever.
Melanie Giamei
Wonderful tribute for a wonderful person. She touched so many in so many ways.
Marge was a unique person who had a huge impact on the lives of so many. She will be deeply missed. ❤️
Oh, so sad to learn of Marge’s passing. I’m moved by the touching tributes to this much- loved person, so kind to everyone she encountered. But I loved the rascal in her. I often attended Theater Works and the Hartford Stage with her, stopping at a restaurant in Higganum after the matinee. Marge inevitably steered me away from a booth to sit at the bar where she would engage in conversation with anyone and everyone. One time, a huge fellow, leather-clad from spurred boots to studded jacket, entered the restaurant and lunged for Marge. I gasped, but he threw his arms around Marge, exclaiming “Mrs. DeBold, my 3rd grade teacher! Wow, it’s so good to see you! I’ll never forget you telling me ‘Always remember, Joseph, pause before jaws.’ I wish I listened better. It would have saved me a lot of trouble. I’d remember, but just too late. Mrs. DeBold, you were the best!” Marge glowed. That was the spirit of many encounters when I sat at a bar with Marge. My favorite were the encounters with former students. I treasure those memories and the memories of the two of us at the kitchen table, catching up with one another.